January 2012
Just outside of New York.
Let’s get drunk.
This couple in front of me on the bus is fucking...
They kicked me out my seat so they could sit together and do this. I should have held my ground.
December 2011
It would be awesome
If my bus showed up.
As soon as I get into the city I am getting as far...
I imagine it will be a lot like a zombie film, only I am a much better protagonist.
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Hey ladies, want to be in my movie?
loosenewleaves:
It’s called ‘We Have Sex and Then I Cry For a Few Hours and You Leave Quietly’. Think Lars von Trier mixed with Forrest Gump and a dash of Battleship Potemkin if it was written by Tom Clancy.
Principal photography starts as soon as we’re all naked.
Bryan Menegus: The Eisenstein of porn.
himynameiscarl replied to your post: Explaining to people with bad opinions why Nic Cage is the greatest actor of our time really isn’t worth the trouble.
“#You wear fingerless gloves #You have no right to judge anyone” real talk
I try to keep it as real as possible.
I'd like to let everyone that I will be spending...
That I will be making a lot of “we really dropped the ball on that one” jokes.
All night.
Try to stop me.
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Explaining to people with bad opinions why Nic...
It just wasn’t worth the fight.
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Boy, our new neighbors sure love their surround...
Hope they hate air in their tires.
Tonight
Lagavulin 16
Macallan Cask Strength
Ashton Pyramid cigar
Dogfish Head 90
A bunch of great brick oven pizza
Tomorrow:
Ridding the Lower East Side/Brooklyn of all of their booze.
I think I was just party to an $800 bar tab.
Adults, man.
Watching this woman hit on my dad is really weird....
Len-Steal My Sunshine
Going to a scotch and cigar bar with my dad and...
Or: Getting drunk on an expense account.
james-andrews replied to your photo: “Oh hello, I see you’re trying to take a picture…
what? where? when was this?
Good question.
Sometimes I want to call irrelevant celebrities...
“Hey, Tom Arnold. How are you?”
“I’m fine, Marc. Just fine.”
What the fuck is a cornucopia?
crheintz:
I still have no clue on how to picture this in my mind
Some anon asked me about my favorite joke, but it...
A guy is walking along the road and he bumps into a man with a small orange as a head. “Wow. How did you get that small orange as a head?” he asked. “Well, it’s a long story…you still wanna hear it?” replied the man. “Sure.” “OK. Well I was walking down this road a couple of days ago when I came across this lamp. Naturally I rubbed it...
fivefifteen asked: Aren't you at a bar right now?
I'm drunk. Questions? Answers? →
I think the bartender just gave me a pint glass of...
I’m not complaining.
Sobering up so I can drive to the bar.
That sounds really bad if you think about it.
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yeahiwasintheshit replied to your post: Do I want to take a $60 job shooting a funeral?
photographing or filming?
Filming, which would honestly probably be an amazing looking funeral video, but I don’t think anyone wants a cinematic funeral video.
I don’t know why they want a funeral video to begin with, especially from a stranger.
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Do I want to take a $60 job shooting a funeral?
Absolutely not.
synecdoche replied to your link: Recommend something for my drunk friends and I do to on New Year’s in New York.
i think there’s a party in times square.
Oh right. Almost dropped the ball on that one.
Recommend something for my drunk friends and I do... →
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It's always refreshing seeing two 60-something...
And I got to practice my “disapproving dad” look, which is always a plus.
Heads up
There’s a marathon of “The Layover” on Travel Channel all day.
CC: Bryan
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